It was the most physically arduous season yet for the Wallaroos, playing more Test matches in a calendar year than ever before, but for former captain Grace Hamilton, 2022 was also the most mentally draining of her career as she struggled to rediscover her passion for rugby in a season she labelled simply as "tough".
After losing the captaincy and then being dropped from the opening O'Reilly series match against New Zealand, Hamilton's seventh season in Wallaroos colours got off to a hard start. But beyond all that, there were far greater issues taking a mental toll -- the recent death of her father at the top of the list.
"I think last year I probably struggled a little bit mentally, it's not a secret to anyone, I've been pretty open about that," Hamilton told ESPN. "I struggled a little bit, but I kind of overcame that and I played a pretty good World Cup and there's nothing better than playing for Australia.
"I don't think that [losing the captaincy] was kind of the catalyst of what it all was about. I really respect Shannon [Parry] and she was obviously the captain when I first came into the Wallaroos squad, it was just like your old captain coming back and she is a great leader.
"It was probably more like I lost my dad and then I lost, I don't know, I lost that fire in my belly to want to keep going.
"It was probably coming off the back of that, probably losing the biggest rugby supporter in Australia, and then playing our first Test since COVID last year... the first Test I played since my dad died, that was it, and it was compounded by some politics within rugby.
"Just getting through that was probably the biggest milestone for me and then coming out the other end and now I just feel like I can play with a little bit more freedom."
Hamilton's dad, John, was known across the Australian rugby community, but especially in the central west region of NSW where he was a revered figure in country rugby having served as NSW Country Junior Rugby president for many years before he passed away from cancer in late 2019.
He was Grace's biggest fan, travelling to all her games, making sure to be a presence in the crowd, while the pair spoke daily during the season to debrief after games and talk all things rugby.
Still, it wasn't until the opening Wallaroos' match of 2022 that those emotions truly boiled over. Having not played any Tests in 2020 or 2021 because of COVID, Hamilton took to the field for the national anthem to face Fijiana at Suncorp Stadium and as her eyes searched the crowd for her family, the tears started to fall.
"I always just like would find Dad in the crowd, but especially when I play for Australia, I'd find him and he'd just nod his head and like 'you'll be good, you'll be great' and just not having that.
"Obviously my brother and my sister and my mum and everyone were all there, I know they support me full heartedly. But I was like, 'OK, this is it' and I was always told you just got to get on with it so that's what I'm doing.
"So last year was tough, but we're out the other side and I'm excited for the season ahead."
As she reflected on a season that involved a new coach, 10 Test matches and a World Cup which resulted in a quarterfinal finish, the 31-year-old acknowledged that she wasn't always at her best on the field -- despite ranking as one of the leading ball carriers at the tournament -- but she was able to push herself to the limit and always believed the Wallaroos could come home as champions.
"Physically there were days where you're tired and you just didn't want to make a tackle and things like that, but the girls all got around it," Hamilton told ESPN. "There were those little moments of whinging, but it's a really special thing to be able to play for Australia and represent the country.
"For us it was about in those tough moments sticking together and asking yourself why you want to do this, we just had to embrace those opportunities cause not everyone gets that opportunity and it was exciting for us.
"I did [believe we could win the World Cup]. I'm the kind of the person that believes in everything you do and everything you do, you have to do it with purpose. Regardless of the score or where you sit in a game, I go in there like I'm going to win and things didn't go our way. The weather wasn't great, I've never played in those sort of conditions in my life and that probably suited England in our quarterfinal loss.
"But I am a person that fully believes that you can do anything you want to do if you set your mind to it. I'll probably always be that person, whether it's in my normal life or professional life or rugby life. I totally believe the Wallaroos can be on top one day.
"I think also the happier you are, the better you play and there were moments where I wasn't where I probably should have been as an athlete, and I did struggle. I probably didn't ask for enough help from my teammates, I internalized a lot, but I'm out the other end now and I'm excited for it because I feel like I can just like step back and just be free, play the game of footy. I've been enjoying training with the new girls and it's a really refreshing atmosphere this year."
Despite the lengthy season there would be minimal rest for Hamilton as she became one of the many Wallaroos players to head north to Europe to experience and grow playing a different style of rugby at the end of the year. While her teammates Arabella McKenzie, Kaitlan Leaney, Em Chancellor and Lori Cramer would head to the UK to play in the Premiership 15s competition, Hamilton instead reached out to several clubs in France before she signed with Montpellier for five matches.
As well as a new country and new language, she'd try out a new position, moving into openside flanker on occasion. While it wasn't an easy transition, it was the right one for the back-rower as she looked to grow and fall in love with rugby again.
"I always kind of wanted to go overseas and I was meant to go to the UK to play in the Premiership 15s, but it fell through. I've always been interested in France, I wanted to learn a new language and I had the opportunity, so I spoke to a few clubs in France and Montpellier told me to come over and see if I like it. They were so kind over there. They make you feel so valued, and they allow you to play a completely different style of rugby and I really enjoyed that.
"Being in the stage of career I am, it's like I've done all I can in the Australian game and being able to open my eyes, being open to how they play, it was a really fun environment to be in. They made me feel so great and they want me to come back.
"It was eye opening in regard to how you were treated, here it's probably more professionalised but you're treated differently. They get paid and things over there, but you were treated as an adult. Everything was like you got to put in what you get out. It wasn't necessarily like you had to be in uniform every day at every training session or things like that, but more things like if you didn't make the bus on time, it was your fault, you're not playing.
"It was just so different, you had to be committed. You were treated like an adult and when the rugby was on, it was on, and everyone put in 110%. But when you're off the field or between drills, you can just chill, have a chat and things like that, so completely different style of coaching and playing.
"They kicked the ball a lot, so I was running a lot, a lot of kick chases, but it was just exciting because I've never kind of been immersed in that sort of environment and learning a new language, I probably didn't understand half of it, but they were really kind to me, and I really enjoyed it.
"I definitely think it has influenced how I see the game as well. Just seeing how much gain they got off kicking, getting rid of the ball so often. Sometimes I think they need to be a bit more structured, but it opened my eyes into how you can play the game in different ways, in different areas of the field, which is cool."
Farewelling several teammates at the end of the 2022 season and captain Shannon Parry after their opening Test against Fijiana in Sydney, Hamilton is now one of the most experienced players in the group and while she didn't move back into the captaincy role, she remains one of the leaders of the squad.
Reflecting on the achievements and contributions her teammates have made over the years to promote the women's game and build the Wallaroos legacy and her own growth within rugby, Hamilton has no thoughts yet of hanging up the boots herself, instead she believes she's got plenty left to give.
"Ili [Batibasaga], Shannon Parry and Fi Jones and Liz Patu retiring, I remember when I first came into the fold looking up to those girls and being so stoked but so nervous around them, and they've become close friends of mine and I think that's the greatest thing of rugby," Hamilton said. "They've done so much for the game, and I just hope we can keep building that and allow the young ones to know how much these girls have put in to get them where they are today.
"People have asked me about what I'm thinking [about retirement], but I don't know, I think I have a few years in me. I just came back from France; the way they played rugby, just opening my eyes to kind of a different realm of rugby. For me that was really exciting, probably a really refreshing thing as well, going off the back of the World Cup.
"I don't know, it'll happen in the next few years, I'm just not sure. I'll try and get to the next World Cup, maybe, but we'll see. We'll see what happens. I'm pretty confident, just playing my part. And if I'm enjoying it, I'll keep going. If I'm not, then I can step away from the game and I'm pretty comfortable in that."